Before I start this post I would like to make it very clear that I DO NOT WANT ANOTHER BABY! These are the words that I am screaming at my over active hormones lately.
I don’t want another baby for so many reasons, not least because babies 1-3 still wake me up every night, they have destroyed me mentally and physically and I know my pelvic floors would not forgive me a fourth time. Not only have my babies destroyed me, they have also destroyed my house, several washing machines, my car, my garden, my mums house and probably many things that I haven’t found yet.
As well as this, I currently have no space in my life or home for any more lodgers. There is no more room at the inn and I am just starting not one, but two businesses all on my own, so unless the baby is a whizz at social media and can touch type invoices, he/she would not be very conducive to the success of these ventures. (Mainly because I would be sniffing my new born!)
However, despite all of this knowledge and despite the fact that my ” look” is now closer to that of Worzel Gummidge than Kate Moss, my hormones are starting to surge once more – Stupid idiot hormones!
Broodiness has temporarily infected my brain. I’m looking at other women’s baby bumps, thinking “Ahhhhh!” I’m looking at the tiny baby clothes my babies wore, I’m looking at old photos with a rose tinted memory and I’m wondering what is the matter with me?
The academic in me has started researching this phenomenon as it is certainly a ‘thing’. And it seems that lots of women, and quite a few men, have exactly the same thoughts and feelings with no logic behind them at all. It also seems that, in many cases, the more children you have the more intense this feeling becomes. The fact is, this is human nature and it’s very hard to fight your own instincts, no matter how insane they are.
Only last year I was compiling a list of 20 reasons, and counting, why Louise didn’t need another baby. Now look at me! Where’s that list?
I’ve also looked into the triggers of this broody affliction and it seems that there are many, so I have compiled a list of the top 4.
- Your youngest ‘baby’ starting nursery or school.
My youngest has just been signed up to start nursery in September. You would think that the idea of someone else doing nappy changes, wiping his grubby little face and generally entertaining him for a couple of days a week would be just the ticket. I’ve waited a long time for a little break from that tiny maniac! So NO hormones we are not having another one!
Tick tock, tick tock, it’s last chance saloon for you and those ovaries. Better get in there quick! AUGHHH! Shut up hormones.
- The thought that you have experienced your last pregnancy, your last birth experience, your last new born and your last first year.
Oh be still my aching womb. This is the one that really gets me. That secret time in the first trimester when only you know about your baby. Those little baby kicks, that lovely baby bump, that newborn baby smell. Ahhhhhh! But wait a minute… what about the agony of pelvic girdle pain? Not being able to sleep, walk, see your toes… or drink wine! I would like to think that I was radiant and ‘glowing’ during pregnancy, but in reality, by the end of pregnancy number three, this is what happened to me.
- Not feeling needed 24/7
What’s that you say? You had a wee all by yourself? You brushed your hair twice this week? Well, what you should do is have another baby…clearly! Don’t be silly! Drink that hot cup of tea and go and visit your friends. They will have a vague recollection of who you are even if you don’t.
If you too are experiencing unnerving symptoms of broodiness this bit is just for you. There were two pieces of expert advice that I have found on this little research project. When broodiness strikes you
1. Get a pet – It seems that lots of people choose this option.
2. Get some very good contraception (for momentary lapses in reason!)
I will add to this, go and do some of those things you have been waiting to do for the past two years (or 9 years in my case). Decorate the house, weed the garden, go shopping…on your own. Go out for dinner with your friends, go to the hairdressers, enjoy some relaxing therapies and take some time just for you.
Then come home, look at your beautiful babies and take a minute to know how lucky you are.